Thursday, September 11, 2008

Nothing interesting happened today, part 1

It's been just over three months since Mary died. Most days, I'm perfectly fine, but then something hits me, and I'm a wreck. I can deal with feeling sad, as losing Mary is a sad thing, but I hate how it affects my relationships with other people. I generally either get hyper-sensitive or else I get apathetic at these times. Over the weekend, it was apathy, this week it's hyper-sensitive. I'm guessing apathy this weekend too.

Last night, I needed to talk to someone, but I couldn't.

The person who said that they would always be a phone call away, wasn't, and didn't reply over MSN. I ended up crying myself to a fitful sleep. While I know that I'm probably not being ignored, I can't really know either way, but I definitely feel that I am. All I needed was 15 minutes of human contact, a friendly voice, and I couldn't get it.

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